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It's OK to quit- Part 2

Writer's picture: amber dregeramber dreger

Updated: Mar 26, 2024



Does this get easier?

 

I remember my first patient death.

My first year of nursing I was working at a small hospital in rural Manitoba. It was a place where everyone knew everyone, where the coworkers were family and friends outside of work.

That means sometimes (often) the nurses know the patients personally, and this patient in particular was the mother to one of my nurse coworkers.

Tears were shared among them. My empath self felt every one of them, as if they were on my own cheeks.

I remember the moment I shared with an experienced nurse. She was about my mom’s age, and always very kind.

“Does this ever get easier?” I almost cried, in the hallway of two dying patients.

I don’t remember what the answer was, however here is the answer I wish I received:


“No. Sometimes you think it’s easier, and you tell yourself that, but the truth is, we are humans, in a super human role. You are going to see a lot of tragedy, sadness, despair. You will not be able to help everyone. Learn how to deal with that now. Go to a therapist. Start journaling. Start doing something physical so you can release that stress.
If you want to help people, you need to help yourself first. It’s not selfish. It’s smart.”

 

Why did we learn that the job of nursing is so rewarding, it will be worth it all.

It will be worth all the heartache and burnout and missed Christmases and Birthday parties. The truth is, that isn’t true.

Yes, nursing can be a rewarding job. But the reward is not always greater than the effort put forth.


 

If you are experiencing signs of burnout, please, reach out for help. Talk to a trusted supervisor, your Employee Assistance Program, myself or someone else about what you are experiencing. Burnout and Vicarious Trauma do not get better on its own.


To determine if you are experiencing burnout or vicarious trauma (or at high risk), take the self assessment here:






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